5.10.2013

A Letter to My Daughter for Mother's Day


My Dearest Daughter,
Happy Mother’s Day. 

I hope your children have brought you as much joy as you’ve given me. 
I know I’ve not been a perfect mother but I’m the one who has loved you more than anyone and I have loved you in my own way. 

You see, I don’t think I was born with as many “mother” genes as some women.  When I was younger my friends would be drawn to babies like magnets.  I was fine just to take a look and be done.  I certainly didn’t want to hold a baby.  It just looked so fragile…and a bit messy and whiney.  I was much more comfortable holding a kitten or a puppy.
When I got married I knew I wanted a baby.  I was just scared to have a baby.  First of all there’s the nine months of gestation.  Next is the labor process with all the pain.  Finally, you have to rear the baby, a fragile little human being that would totally depend on me for quite some time.  Was I capable of doing all that?

So after five years of marriage we decided we were ready for a baby.  That didn’t stop me from being fearful and nervous though.
After fertility drugs and two miscarriages, we finally had you on the way.

The first three months I vomited.  I vomited so much and so hard I busted blood vessels in my eyes.  The next three months I ate.  I would bring my lunch to work and end up eating it for breakfast and then go buy me another lunch.  The final three months I swelled. I think I had one pair of shoes I could get on my feet.
Then it was time.  After a routine visit, the doctor scheduled me to come to the hospital the next morning.  I think a full afternoon of serious cleaning put me on into labor.  We headed on to the hospital that night.  I was very nervous.  After a long night and a required c-section that morning, you were here.  You were beautiful.  Beautiful.  I checked your little toes and they were perfect.  I was a mom.  My life changed forever.   

I kept waiting for all of those mother genes to kick in.  I literally shook with nerves when I gave you your first bath in your little bath tub.  Everything soon got a bit easier. 
The one mother gene that stood out was protection.  I don’t know if it’s because it was so hard getting you here or what but I watched over you constantly and made sure you were comfortable and safe.  I think I woke up every hour of every night and got up to look and make sure you were breathing as you slept.

I watched you learn and grow and become more beautiful.  I was happy when you were happy and I hurt when you hurt.  But we made it.
The next thing I know, I’m with you at the hospital as you have your own children.  Your babies are beautiful. And I know your life has been changed forever.  And mine changed again because I became a grandmother.

So even though I don’t say it nearly enough, I love you.  I am very proud of the wife and mother you have become.  Tell your children you love them every day.  Make sure they hear it often.  Teach them to be kind and respectful to everyone.  Take them to church.  Set good examples for them to follow.  And most importantly, take them to visit their grandparents often.
I hope this is the best Mother’s Day you’ve ever had.

Always and forever,
With love,

Mom.

2 comments:

Thousand Thoughts said...

Loved it :) very touching

Zineb Bouslahmi said...

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