Dear Pastor,

Dear Pastor,

Is something wrong with me because Halloween is my favorite holiday and Christmas is my least favorite?  As a Christian, I feel like I should be stoned or shunned or take some sort of punishment for even thinking this much less saying it out loud.

The main reason I LOVE Halloween?  NO STRESS!  You buy two or three bags of candy and you’re done.  Boom.  That’s it.  Fun times.

Christmas is quite the opposite.  It should be called Stressmas instead.  Every year I say “I’m not letting Christmas get to me this year” but somewhere along the way that becomes impossible. 

Decorating comes first.  Search, unpack, put up.  Hmmm, I’ve used these same decorations for years it seems.  I need new ones.  But I need to save that money to use for gifts.  Oh well.  Maybe I’ll catch some things on sale after Christmas.  Yes, only ugly things are left for the after Christmas sales. 

My so called relaxing shopping trips become a scavenger hunt to find exactly what this person may like.  I stress over what to buy and then I stress over whether or not the recipient will even like it.  Then I spend hours wrapping those gifts.  This isn’t my favorite thing.  I’ve found myself overusing the pre-decorated gift boxes.  A couple of pieces of tape and stick on a bow and done.  Gift bags are great but they can get expensive and I have a little one that just loves to pull the tissue paper out of the bags.  Sometimes I am forced to use wrapping paper.  How many times have I cut it just a half inch too small forcing me to throw that piece away and start over?  Too many to name.  Every now and then there’s that moment when you are cutting and the scissors start smoothly sliding down the paper without any wrist/finger movement of all.  What a small, short lived victory, but yes, at least one tiny moment to celebrate.

If you like crowds you probably love Christmas.  I don’t.  I seriously don’t.  Crowds stress me out.  My road rage converts to shopping cart rage.  Why do they park them in the middle of the aisle?  Why does Walmart have forty cash registers but only open four?  Why are they always out of what I need?  Most wonderful time of the year?  I don’t think so.

I do love to cook but when I am physically and mentally tired it’s not the best time.  I host two large gatherings at my house so that means cooking and cleaning for both of those.  Somehow the cooking part takes precedence over the cleaning.  Thankfully my dear husband is tremendous help with both of those chores even though I am snapping at him because I am totally stressed out. 

Once the whirlwind of family is over then there’s clean up.  Again.  Boxes, bows and wrapping paper everywhere.  My granddaughters open one gift, throw it aside and then look for the next one.  I’m trying to teach them that there’s more to Christmas than gifts.  Much more.

And then there’s the stress of watching the checkbook balance get on down to near nothing.  I find myself counting the days until Christmas by paydays. 

I think the time of year has quite a bit to do with my loathing of Christmas also.  The long of hours of darkness seem to act like a barricade to me.  Once I get home from work and the darkness closes in I feel like I am trapped and cannot leave my house.  I become a bit of a hermit during the winter months.

On shopping, on wrapping, on cleaning and cooking.  On parties, on PARADES, ON…WHAT HAPPENED TO MY CHECKBOOKING?

It seems logical that Christmas should be a peaceful, serene yet celebratory time of year.  After all, we are celebrating the most amazing gift that has ever been given.  We should spend this time praising and worshipping the King, relaxing and enjoying family.  NOT stressing out.

So yes, even I think it’s sad that the first thing that comes to mind when I realize Christmas is approaching is…dread.  Maybe next year…next year it will be the “ONE”.  The one I can just relax and enjoy.  Just Maybe. 

So, dear pastor, am I totally messed up because I don’t like Christmas?  Does anyone else feel like I do?  Do I just need medication?  Should I be punished?  Who shall cast the first stone?

Sincerely,

A Tired, Stressed out Child of the King

Things I can do when the last grandbaby is older...

I can finally remove the ugly foam rubber corner protectors on my entertainment stand and granite fireplace hearth.

I can put all my pretty whatnots back on my end tables.

I can have a coffee table.

I can have a new couch in any color I want.

I can trade in the rocking chair for a nice lounge chair.

I can get rid of the baby bed and changing table and have a guest room that isn’t so crowded.

I can clean out all the extra sets of clothes I have in my drawers and closets for those emergencies or unexpected sleepovers.

I can get rid of the little toilet training seat and step stool in the bathroom.

I can go to the bathroom without someone in there with me.

I can throw away all the toys that stay scattered all over my floors.

I can get rid of all the sippy cups and baby forks and spoons.

 

Things I can’t do when the last grandbaby is older…

I can’t watch a little girl dancing in front of the television.

I can’t skip dusting all of the whatnots.

I can’t walk past the coffee table without snagging my little toe.

I can’t make up my mind on a couch.

I can’t hold and rock a baby while singing “You are My Sunshine”.

I can’t walk into the guest room and see a baby in that crib holding up arms and smiling because she knows I’ll get her out.

I can’t feel a tiny, warm body next to mine or have little feet in my face because I won’t have any extra clothes for those unexpected sleepovers.

I won’t see any clapping hands or beaming smile when they show me #2 in the potty.

I won’t have anyone to talk to while I’m in the bathroom.  My husband doesn’t find that fun for some reason.

I won’t throw away all the toys or sippy cups or little forks and spoons because some of them are special.  Some of them belonged to mommy or big sisters or they were a gift from a family member or special friend.

And who knows when there will be a great grandbaby that might need them.

The Enchilada Debacle

Yesterday I decided to take the afternoon off just to relax.  It was one of those “I need a break” days.  My husband normally cooks supper so I thought I’d cook for a change.  I love cooking and normally only do it on the weekends.  I had all the fixings for enchiladas and a new recipe I wanted to try out as a side dish as well.      

I had plenty of time to relax before starting supper.  I walked around the yard and admired the squash, tomatoes, and peppers that are growing nicely in the patio garden.  The volunteer sunflower from the winter seed we give the birds is growing quickly and is already about 18” tall.  We love feeding the birds.  We always throw old bread out in the backyard for them to eat.  And before you bird fanciers go into a panic, I have researched and though bread doesn’t provide any nutritional value for birds it does not harm them.  I noticed my husband had thrown several slices of bread out back for them. 

Later on in the day I started supper.  Chicken was cooked and shredded and I got my taco potatoes ready and in the oven before I finished up the enchiladas.  I mixed up all the soups, cheese, sour cream, tomatoes and mixed it together.  No, this is not a diet dish.  That part was ready so I needed my flour tortillas to fill, roll and top so it could go in the oven.  I look in the pantry.  No tortillas.  I had just bought a pack.  I looked around on the counter to make sure I hadn’t already got them out and forgot about it.  No where.  Then I thought…but no, surely not.  He didn’t throw out the tortillas to the birds!  I looked out the back door and from a distance those bread slices sure looked pretty round to me.

So I asked my hubby just what it was he fed to the birds.  “Those old tortillas”.  Old?  Those were not the old tortillas.  I had thrown the old ones in the garbage a few days earlier.  So, we tried to come up with an alternative.  We found a half empty box of taco shells in the pantry.  Stale.  Maybe some chips would work.  Not enough.  Bread?  No.  Only thing to do was drive to the local grocery which is only 18 miles away and get some. 

So, he did.  We ate.  It was good.  We survived.  And I hope the birds enjoyed those nice, fresh tortillas.  And we’ll take suggestions for recipes that use enchilada filling but no tortillas. 

Pill Problems

I have a confession.  I have a drug problem.  Actually it’s more of a drug packaging problem.

I don’t go to a doctor unless I have to.  The whole doctor, hospital, medical thing rather scares me.  I’ve never liked taking medication of any kind.  Neither pills nor liquids.  After a major surgery a few years ago I was supposed to take B12 vitamins for life.  I did good there for a few months but then it got so hard to put that little pill in my mouth.  So, I stopped.  After a couple of years I started having some odd health issues.  Everything I read on Dr. Internet pointed to “B12 deficiency”.  So I begrudgingly started taking those again.         

Just recently I was prescribed a cholesterol and a blood pressure pill so I figured I’d better take those if I wanted to live.  I had no idea the drug manufacturers had stopped using pill bottles and switched to those aluminum foil blister pack things in a cardboard box.  It says to “press down and pull” but apparently those instructions are for the incredible hulk, not the average human being.  I press and I pull and I never can get the pill pack out.  I try pressing and pulling at the same time, pressing then pulling but it won’t budge.  My temper flares and I go into Lizzie Borden mode and I get my axe...one, two, three…eighteen…twenty nine…forty whacks.  There, that should do it.  Okay, so actually I take out the scissors and cut and tear the cardboard box open and then rip out the pill pack.  

Next you have to push that pill out of the pack.  You have to push with one hand and catch the pill with the other hand.  This should be easy, right?  I have to apply so much pressure on this super strength tin foil stuff I send the pill flying right out of my hand.  On the floor.  My mysophobia kicks in immediately.  My pill is on the floor.  The floor.  Where people have walked.  The dirty, disgusting floor full of grit and dirt and hair and feces and, and maggots and alien species.  Nooooo.  The six second rule flashes through my mind.  One Mississippi, two Mississippi…I’m frantically searching…five Mississippi…I’m still searching…seven Mississippi and there it is.  Seven seconds.  Too late.  This pill is going in the garbage.  Now I have to get another one.  I lean over the counter this time.  Push, pop, and it bounces on the counter top a couple of times and bam, I manage to grab it.  Whew. 

And since I am OCD I must always push those pills out in the proper order.  Top row, left to right, then down to the next row, right to left.  Never push the pills out of order.  I think they turn into a placebo if you do that.  Yes, yes, I’m quite sure they do.

I’m not sure what the reason is for this new anti-human packaging.  Is it cheaper to package it this way?  Is it easier to dispense this way?  Is it for safety reasons?  It’s definitely childproof.  Adultproof too.

Personally I wish they’d bring back the good ol’ pill bottle.  Push down and turn.  Push down and turn…I could do that. 

The Mississippi I know

ABC News posted a headline on facebook last night about the shooting at the Walmart in Iuka.  For those not familiar with this town it is pronounced eye-YOU-ka.  That is a capital “i”, not a lower case “L” as many news outlets have posted incorrectly.  As I was reading the comments I noticed that while a few commenters offered prayers and concern for those involved most of the comments included words like redneck, backwoods, racists, homophobes, trigger happy, gun control and Christian haters.  I am quite certain these people have never visited, much less lived in Mississippi.  They rely totally on the many negatives that have been told by the media and disagree with our laws and lifestyle. 

I know this state and its people as kind, hospitable, charitable, intelligent, athletic, hardworking and happy.  Many studies will tell you otherwise.  These studies base their claims on income, graduation rates, emotional and physical well-being among other things. 

Our income may not come close to those on Wall Street or Silicon Valley but that doesn’t make us any less of a person or even an unhappy person.  The cost of living is much less so we don’t require six and seven figure incomes to live.  Most everyone I know has a home and plenty of food to eat.  Yes, we have those that struggle financially and even homeless people.  I’m not saying things are perfect.  I’m saying the majority of people live happy, fulfilling lives.

I know many men and women that didn’t graduate from high school but have decent paying jobs.  There are lots of people in construction, manufacturing and the oil field.  I would advise everyone to graduate and get some college but it isn’t mandatory to earn a living. 

We take care of our sick and our elderly and those in need.  Remember Katrina?  We didn’t sit around and wait for the government to come help us.  We started cleaning up and building back and seeking those in need and lending a hand and offering food.  I know.  I lost my home but didn’t lose my faith in my neighbors.

Yes, we have guns.  They are mainly used for hunting which provides food for our families.  Are there people out there that should not have a gun?  Yes.  Is there any way to control those people and not allow them to have one?  No.  No matter what kind of gun control may be imposed upon a people there will be ways to get one.  We can’t take guns out of well meaning and well minded people hands because of a few that will abuse it.  It can’t be done.  Don’t argue with me.

I won’t even try to mention the musicians, chefs, authors, and sports figures that come from Mississippi.  Go here http://www.mississippibelieveit.com/ads-mechanicals/ and read about it.

So while others read the headline last night about the shooting at Walmart they started writing hateful, negative comments.  Us Mississippians started praying.

I could go on forever about the good things in our state.  I honestly believe that if this world stays here for another one hundred years outsiders still will not know what a great place it is.  And that’s okay.  It’ll be our secret. 

I Don't Like Christmas

I don’t like Christmas.

I said it.

Go ahead, call me a scrooge, a Grinch, a heathen.

What Christmas is:

Stressful
Costly
Busy
Over commercialized, WAY over commercialized
Tiring

I just don’t see it as “the most wonderful time of the year” anymore.  I did as a child.  Not anymore.  I don’t like it.

Now I must shop and shop and shop, going to store after store, mall after mall, spending hours online.  I spend way too much money but I HAVE to get that perfect gift for everyone.  Then I spend time worrying as to whether or not I bought the right thing and if the recipient will like it or not.  And I have to make sure I spend the same amount on everyone and have the same number of gifts so no one will get their feelings hurt. Then I hide everything until I get time to wrap.  It’ll take a while to remember where all I have things hidden and drag them all out for wrapping.  I’m not an elaborate wrapper.  I learned a long time ago that the pre decorated gift boxes and gift bags are quick and easy and don’t require any cutting in a straight line.  I must make the parades to see the grandbabies.  I must decorate the house which means rearranging the furniture and sticking my normal décor somewhere for the holiday.  I must clean the house because guests are coming.  I have to decide when this side of the family comes and when the other side of the family comes and who works when and how to work around everyone.  That has become a major issue as the family grows.  I plan menus, buy groceries and cook for what seems like days.  Then I clean up.

 
All this while working a full time job.  No, my job doesn’t stop so I can “celebrate” Christmas. 

So when do I enjoy the holiday? 

Who decided this is how Christmas should be?  WHO?

In the words of Ellen Griswald, “I don't know what to say, except it's Christmas and we're all in misery.”

Then there’s this:

I think of loved ones who've passed away
And I pray their resting in a better place
I think of memories of years gone by
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

I think of soldiers across the sea

And Sometimes I wonder why
It's them instead of me
For my freedom they give their lives
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

Tears of thankfulness, tears of hope

I cry tears of joy at Christmas cause I know
There is peace on earth for every heart to find
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

I think of families, I think of home

And say a prayer
For those who spend this time alone
Cause love can reach out into a silent night
And that's why Christmas makes me cry

Tears of thankfulness, tears of hope

I cry tears of joy at Christmas cause I know
There is peace on earth for every heart to find
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

I think of Mary and the virgin birth

And I'm amazed at how much
God thinks we're worth
That He would send His only Son to die
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

Tears of thankfulness, tears of hope

I cry tears of joy at Christmas cause I know
There is peace on earth for every heart to find
And sometimes Christmas makes me cry

(Written by Matthew West and recorded by Mandisa)

Christmas isn’t always the jolliest season for everyone.  Some people are struggling with illness, family issues, homelessness, grief, depression.  Even if we are busy and run down and have spent all our money, take time to reach out to someone, pray for them, send a card or message, bake a cake, give to a charity if at all possible.  Make the season mean something.  We won’t all be here for the next Christmas.

What Christmas should be:

Joyful
Family time
Reflective
Worshipful
Holy

Charlie Brown: [shouting in desperation] Isn't there anyone out there who can tell me what Christmas is all about?

Linus Van Pelt: Sure, Charlie Brown, I can tell you.  Lights, please.

[a spotlight shines on Linus] And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the fields, keeping watch over their flocks by night. And lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the lord shone round about them, and they were sore afraid. And the angel said unto them, Fear not, for behold, I bring unto you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people. For unto you this day is born in the City of Bethlehem, a Savior, which is Christ the Lord. And this shall be a sign unto you; you shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger. And suddenly there was with the angel, a multitude of the heavenly host, praising God, and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest, and on Earth peace, good will toward men'. That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie brown.

(A Charlie Brown Christmas – 1965)

I think Linus was spot on.  I think we need to slow down and come back to the heart of Christmas.  I think it should be more about the birth of our Savior and less about us.  I think we should spend TIME with family and not so much money on family.  Celebrate, yes that’s fine, but keep things simple and don’t forget why we have Christmas to begin with. 

I have to again give Matthew West credit for being such a big part of my blog post but he has already sang so perfectly what I’m talking about:

“Heart of Christmas”

I’m gonna make a wish this Christmas

I’m gonna say a little prayer
I’m gonna stop here for a moment
Before the moment disappears

The world’s in a hurry this December

City streets and shopping malls
I wish we could slow down and remember
The meaning of it all

Wherever you are, no matter how far

Come back to the heart, the heart of Christmas
Live while you can, cherish the moment
The ones that you love, make sure they know it
Don’t miss it, the heart of Christmas

Let’s make it feel the way it used to

Let’s find that wonder of a child
You can see the magic all around you
Come on, and open up your eyes

You can find it in the warm embrace of your family

Or calling up a long lost friend
You can even find it in the eyes of stranger
When you reach out a helping hand

Wherever you are, no matter how far

Come back to the heart, the heart of Christmas
Live while you can, cherish the moment
The ones that you love, make sure they know it
Don’t miss it, the heart of Christmas

In the shadow of a steeple

In a star that lights the way
You will find Him in a manger
The heart of Christmas has a name

I’m gonna make a wish this Christmas

I’m gonna say a little prayer

Wherever you are, no matter how far

Come back to the heart, the heart of Christmas
Live while you can and cherish the moment
The ones that you love, make sure they know it

Wherever you are, no matter how far

Come back to the heart, the heart of Christmas
Live while you can, cherish the moment
The ones that you love, make sure they know it
Don’t miss it, the heart of Christmas
(Written and recorded by Matthew West)

So where do I start?  When do I start?

One day maybe I can enjoy Christmas again.  One day.

Hooked on a Feeling

Do you ever get that “feeling”?  I don’t know if there’s a word for it or how to describe it.  It’s a mixture of excitement, anticipation, fear, dread, wonder.  It’s just different.  But it’s there and very prevalent when it happens.  And I like it.  I think.

I can think of at least three things that cause me to get that feeling.

First, Fall.  It’s my favorite season (other than FOOTBALL season but that’s a whole other blog so I digress).  *singing* It’s the most wonderful time of the year!  Yes, Fall, not Christmas.  Christmas should be about that precious gift we received a couple of thousands of years ago and a celebration of the birth of that gift but it has become a glamorized, money grabbing, commercialized, stressful, hectic, rushed, (and I could go on but you get the picture) mass chaos.  But again, that is a whole other blog so I digress.

Back to fall.  Nothing is more beautiful to me than the colors of fall.  Golds, oranges, greens, browns.  Warm colors.  The colors I have in my house because they comfort me and appeal to my senses.  There are the gentle breezes bringing in the cooler and dryer air and pushing out the heat and humidity that’s held us captive for three months.  I love driving with the windows down and watches the trees move and shake the leaves off their branches.  I love to watch those leave fall and float ever so slowly to the ground.  I love the colors of those leaves.  And no, it may not be as colorful way down here in the south but it’s still beautiful.  Such a contrast to the dark green we’ve had all summer.  With fall comes mums and pumpkins.  Nothing is more beautiful to me than a display of those flowers with pumpkins and gourds and maybe a hay bale or two with a scarecrow standing guard proudly as if to say “see, this is my season and my bounty!”  

With fall, comes some good eating!  Daddy always planted his greens in the fall.  Mustard, turnips and my favorite, collards.  Oh my.  Nothing but greens and cornbread make a full meal for me.  While those mustard and turnips are still tiny and tender, we’d have wilted salads.  First you fry some bacon up crisp and save that grease!  Mother always mixed in some lettuce with the greens, then added green onions, chopped boiled eggs and crumbled bacon.  Then you take that hot grease and pour it over all of this.  You can hear the crackle.  Add a splash of vinegar and that’s it.  You might have some greasy lips while you’re eating but it sure is delicious.  Once the greens were older then we’d have them cooked down.  Daddy considered himself the expert green cooker.  He had a specific cast iron pot and some tricks he used to get the bitterness out and a certain length of time he cooked them.  I guess he knew what he was doing because they were delicious. 

And fall brings my favorite holiday.  Halloween.  Yes, I am a Christian and know other fellow believers that will cringe when they hear me say that.  I’m not getting into the origin, that’s what google if for, as to whether it began as Christian or pagan nor am I arguing with anyone about it.  And you will not change my mind about it if you have an opposing view.  Growing up, we participated in Halloween every year.  I did not become a witch or satan worshipper because of it either.  Neither did any of my family or friends.  It was all fun.  That’s how I see Halloween.  It’s not stressful.  All fun.  You buy the children costumes, or make them if you’re frugal and creative, and buy a few bags of candy and enjoy.  No cooking, no tons of gifts to buy, no worrying if someone will like that gift or not, no messy egg dye, no flowers that will die in three days.  We have an enormous festival at church every year.  Now it’s a Hallelujah Festival mind you, not a Halloween festival.  There are several hundred people there to eat, have fun and get candy!  It’s just such a wonderful time of fun and fellowship. 

Ah yes.  All this brings on that feeling. 

Second, vacation.  Now I am an extreme homebody and a mysophobe so vacationing isn’t exactly my thing but sometimes I do get brave and break out.  It’s just something about the planning, packing, getting ready, loading the car and then leaving early in the morning for a trip.  Pulling out of the drive brings on that feeling.  The worst part is over and all we have to do is look forward to some rest and relaxation.  No worries for just a while.  And the biggie…NO ROUTINE.  I have spent almost my entire life doing the same thing every day.  First school, then work.  Same thing.  Every day.  Sometimes you just NEED to break out of the routine.  Even us homebodies do.  Especially us homebodies.  Oh the feel of cool, crisp air in the mountains, or the cool breeze blowing off the ocean water.    

Vacation brings on that feeling.

Third, a hurricane.  So this is where the anticipation and fear part comes in to play the most I think.  And excitement.  Okay, now I’m not “excited” about devastation and destruction that a hurricane brings.  Hey, Katrina smashed my house down so I know what that’s like.  It’s just something about an approaching storm that brings on that feeling.  My snooze button gets lonely because I always wake up and get dressed early to watch all of the forecasts before I head to work.  They always show that path prediction cone…that dreaded cone of doom!  Even with all of today’s technology it’s still just a gamble predicting which way it will go and how strong it will be.  I watch all of those people standing on the shore with the wind whipping their hair.  Soon it will be rain beating them in the face.  But they stay there.  Well except for Al Roker who was blown away.  And they always, always show that stop sign flapping in the wind.  If it’s coming ashore near us I love to feel the wind pick up.  First gently and then it gets a bit harder.  Then the rain.  I’ve always loved the rain.  I love sitting on the porch while the elements do their thing.  I’ve even spent my lunch break watching the heavy interstate traffic coming from the south when there was a storm approaching Louisiana. 

So, a good, mild tropical storm, without any spin off tornadoes, gives me that feeling.

Okay, so maybe I’ve nailed down that feeling or maybe I haven’t.  It seems like one thing all of these three have in common is the wind.  Have you ever seen the movie The Happening?  The wind comes blowing in something (I never figured that part out) and causes people to go crazy and kill themselves.  Don’t fret if you’ve never seen it.  It was the worse movie M. Night Shyamalan has ever done.  Anyway, I don’t know if the winds are blowing something over me or what.  I still can’t explain the feeling. 

And right now there’s fall and vacation just right around the corner.  I’m kind of getting that feeling just waiting for that feeling.  You know that feeling, right?  Or am I just a bit crazy?

Final Days

I’ve been thinking about death a lot lately.  I don’t consider this anything unusual.  I assume most people do this as they get older.

Am I ready for death?  Yes, spiritually.  But it’s certainly not anything I want rushed up.  I do think about my grandchildren and hope I can see them graduate and get married.  And I’d like to hold my great grandchildren.  I think about family and friends who do not know the Lord and hope there is more time to witness to them. 

As I age, each little ache I get makes me suspicious.  What is this?  Will it go away?  Is it something serious?  Relax, it’s just an ache.  It will go away.  Hopefully.  

I have several friends that are dealing with catastrophic illnesses. I have watched them battle courageously and wondered if I could fight the same way or would I hang my head in defeat.  I seriously believe our attitude has a lot to do with how we heal.  Some of those friends will be healed.  Others will not.  Death does not discriminate. 

             “This world has nothing for me.  This world is not my home.”              
             - Building 429

I’ve lost several friends over the past few months.  Unexpected deaths.  This really hits home.  I’d love to have one last chance to spend time with them and to hug them and tell them just how much I value their friendship.    

“Don’t it always seem to go that you don’t what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone.”
– Joni Mitchell

At times I consider social media, namely Facebook, a nemesis.  It digs into our time we could be using more productively, reading our bible, talking to our family.  Then again, I love the way it has brought me back in touch with so many of my old friends and school mates.  You don’t realize how much you’ve missed someone until you see them face to face again.      

“When you are in the final days of your life, what will you want?  Will you hug that college degree in the walnut frame?  Will you ask to be carried to the garage so you can sit in your car?  Will you find comfort in rereading your financial statement?  Of course not.  What will matter then will be people. If relationships will matter most then, shouldn't they matter most now?”     
- Max Lucado

Death does not discriminate.  Be prepared.  Be ready.  Tomorrow is not promised.

“Turn your eyes upon Jesus.  Look full in his wonderful face.  And the things of earth will grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.” 
- Helen H. Lemmel

Young people, stay in touch with your friends.  Don’t sit back and say “they never call me”.  Make the first move and send them a message.  If there are any hard feelings, apologize.  Just don’t lose them.  Death will come knocking on your door one day.  And theirs.  Then it will be too late.

“Make new friends but keep the old.  One is silver and the other is gold.”

Maybe I'm the Nerd

My granddaughters’ school participates in this drug prevention program every year called “Red Ribbon Week”.  I certainly have no problem with this and think any lesson learned about the consequences of drugs is great, whether it be taught at school or home.  But they have character dress up day each day and I just can’t figure out the correlation between dressing up as someone and drugs.  What is the point?  Is it just for fun or is there a lesson in it somewhere?  Maybe the point is western people don’t do drugs and whacky dressed people don’t do drugs and so on...maybe?  Okay, so I guess it’s all for fun then.

Today is nerd day.  Last night my six year old granddaughters asked me what a nerd was.  I told them in children’s lingo “it’s someone who is really, really, really smart and studies all the time and may not be very cute and is pretty much a bookworm”.  What?  Did I just tell them that smart people are someone you can make fun of and if you are smart people call you a derogatory name?  Something just wasn’t right about that.  Maybe I’ve had the definition of nerd wrong all these years.  When I got home I looked up the definition to affirm or hopefully negate my thinking. 

Nerd:  1.  offensive term: an offensive term that deliberately insults somebody's physical appearance or social skills

2.  single-minded enthusiast: somebody who is considered to be excessively interested in a subject or activity that is regarded as too technical or scientific

The first word I see, offensive.  And then, single minded.  Yes, why would we pick on someone for loving to learn or how they look or their hobbies?  Isn’t this a form of bullying?  Is it okay to be a bully as long as you don’t do drugs? 

I’m not sure who comes up with the character days, if it’s within the school or if they are following the national program, but maybe they should rethink “nerd” day.

My granddaughters didn’t dress up today.  Not for this reason but another.  I’m kind of glad though.

Do I have a point here or am I being too pc about this?

Monday Night Football

I don’t want to get hung up on football stories but here are a few thoughts and observations from Monday night’s game:

Saints vs Dolphins

It was pretty cool seeing Steve Young and Ray Lewis at the ESPN booth.

I always LOVE seeing Steve Gleason at the game.  Mr. Benson made an appearance on the sideline before the game.

Burnell Taylor did an excellent job singing the national anthem.

The crowd was extremely loud.  We didn’t want to walk out of there being the 3 and 1 team.  And we didn’t.

We had Deuce McAllister sitting in the box next to us and one box down was Willie Robertson and some guy named Kenny Chesney.  They tell me he’s a country music singer.  I don’t do country music.

BEST. HALFTIME. SHOW. EVER.  Southern University knows HOW to put on a show.

Brees broke some records.  I like what I see in Khiry Robinson and Kenny Stills.  Stills has the coolest hair.  Greer had an excellent game.  Our defense held up even without Vilma and Harper.  I’m beginning to like Rob Ryan.  Sorta.  Sproles is a 5’ 6” piece of dynamite. 

My favorite part of the game is watching players from BOTH teams, those that chose to do so, gather at midfield after the game and have prayer. 

4 and 0.  Sounds good.  Sounds really good.

I don’t do too well on three and a half hours of sleep.

Under the Dome

Don’t worry, I’m not about to critique the Stephen King series that’s currently running on one of the alphabet channels.  Even though I am a huge science fiction fan I’m no fan of King.  After “It” I gave up on him.  That was just too farfetched and disappointing for me.  Give me real sci fi like Deep Space Nine, The X-Files or Stargate SG-1.

I’m talking about my experience at the Saints game.  I’ve been before but this was the most thrilling game I’ve ever seen live.  I mean a real nail biter.  It made me as nervous as the drive down there did.  Oh yes, the drive.  Let me start there.

I can handle the New Orleans traffic.  It’s just the roads I cannot handle.  Why would you build a city below sea level?  I am claustrophobic, acrophobic and aquaphobic so driving on roads that are built high above the streets and waters with concrete walls on each side just shuts me down.  And for some reason I always manage to miss a turn and end up on one of these horrifying roads.  I have to slow down to a crawl and focus directly ahead while I’m white knuckling and on the verge of hyperventilating.  Yesterday the road had a really nice giant curve and slant which made it even worse.  And where did we come out at the end of that road?  Not the best part of town by the looks of it.  Thankfully it was Sunday morning and it seemed rather quiet and peaceful.  The little gps lady finally got us back on track and we made it to the parking garage we were looking for.

For those that have never been, the Superdome is stuck in the middle of town.  It’s not like any other athletic facility I’ve ever been to.  Most places have plenty of room and a nice large parking area to accommodate everyone.  Not here.  Just city streets and private parking garages.  Parking isn’t cheap and the closer you get to the Dome the more expensive it is.  We have found a garage we like to park in that is fairly reasonable ($20) plus it is easy access out of there.  Or it should be anyway.  Somehow we find a way to make it hard.  But this garage is one mile from the Dome.  Yes, quite a hike especially in 95 degree temps on asphalt and concrete.  There are tailgaters early along the way that have managed to squeeze into open parking lots and set up shop.  That Cajun food always smells good!!!

But once you make that trek and arrive at the Dome, what a view! 

Champions Square was rocking as usual.  We get to the gate and get scanned and then enter the building.  Air conditioner!!!  I prefer open stadiums but during late summer in the south it is good to be inside.  We made our way up to the box on the third level.  Since I’m lucky enough to be in the company box (which includes the tickets by the way) we get to eat some of that good Cajun food.  It’s always a variety, like jambalaya, gumbo, shrimp and grits, chicken wings, meat pies, sandwiches, bread pudding, and I could go on. 

We watch the receivers warm up.  Lance Moore is doing his thing!  I’m still trying to figure out who the guy with the two colored Mohawk is.  Jimmy Graham is over to the side throwing a ball with a little bitty guy and having some pictures made.  Just a lucky fan I assume.  Scott Fujita is signing some autographs.  Deuce McAllister is sitting in the box next to us.

Then the big guy walks in.  No, not Drew Brees but Willie Robertson!  And Martin.  For those that may not know Willie is owner of the Duck Dynasty kingdom.  I still have no idea why they were there but they took plenty of photos including some with the Saintsations and then spent the first half on the sidelines.

And I’m kidding about Willie being bigger than Drew.  Of course Drew is the star in THIS house.  We watch him lead the team in the pregame chant.  Awesome as always.   

The LSU band performs and there are some pregame announcements and rituals and then came the most touching moment in a ballgame I’ve ever seen.  On the giant screen they run a film on ALS research.  Not only were there Saints players taking part but many different players and coaches from the NFL.  And Steve Gleason spoke last.  Oh my.  Chillbumps and tears.  Then Coach Peyton and Steve come out onto the field together.  I never dreamed I’d be crying at an NFL game but I couldn’t hold the tears back.  What an emotional moment.  If anyone doesn’t know the significance in this just google Steve Gleason and find out.   

Game time!  The announcer says to welcome the Atlanta Falcons into the stadium.  Everyone boos.  Nice welcome I’m thinking.  Let’s show some southern hospitality even if this is our biggest rival.   

Yes, the dome truly is the loudest stadium in the world.  It was deafening but didn’t seem to faze the Falcons that much.  They were putting points on the board.  On the other hand the Saints had some trouble getting started.  The defense couldn’t cover their receivers.  I wasn’t getting upset yet because Drew has brought us back on top so many times before and there was plenty of time.  But this time it would be the defense that would save the day.  Down by 6 the Falcons had a chance to make the winning touchdown and leave us with just a few seconds to retaliate.  But on fourth and goal the defense held up and got an interception!  Of course we ran the last few seconds of the clock out on a knee.  Whew.  What a thriller!

So we head out, squeezed in by the crowds that are hollering “Who Dat” all the way. We pass the Gleason statue and then somehow in the massive crowd we missed our off ramp and walked down into Champions Square instead so we have to walk back into the opposite flow of the masses.  I found a guy with a baby in a stroller headed our way too.  I got behind him and magically a baby makes people stop and let you pass.  I told him thanks for the help.

 

We made the one mile trek back to the parking garage and managed to get on the right ramp out of there.  Homeward bound.

I must say the excitement and thrill of watching a ball game live in the Superdome is unmatched but it’s much easier watching it on television.  All in all though, I think it’s going to be a great season.

Why I'm Taking a Break from Facebook

1 Thessalonians 1:9  ESV  For they themselves report concerning us the kind of reception we had among you, and how you turned to God from idols to serve the living and true God.

I’ve said it before, facebook can be a good thing or it can be a bad thing.

I’ve tremendously enjoyed reconnecting with old friends, classmates and family.  I like reading about what’s going on in their lives, seeing pictures of their children and grandchildren and interacting with them with some simple key strokes.  It’s also a very good source for news and information, both local and national.

But the longer I’m on facebook the less interesting it becomes.  User fatigue has set in with many, including myself, I believe.  I don’t know that it will go the way of its predecessor, myspace, and totally fade away since its users are in the millions, but my account has become a little less stimulating because of lack of participation.  Posts by personal friends (which are the most interesting to me) have become few.  My news feed is mainly filled with posts by news and sports organizations and opinion and retail pages.  While I enjoy keeping up with the news this way, I can always turn on the tv or go to a newspaper website and get the same information. 

Lately I’ve found myself frequently hiding or deleting posts.  Some posts and photos are just a bit too risqué for my taste.  Some of the sports sites are the main culprits.  I guess they figure if you like sports you are a rowdy, testosterone filled male that doesn’t mind a half nude photo or harsh language.  Not all sports fans are like that.

A recent study has also found that facebook makes people feel bad about themselves.  I can see how that can happen.  Even though the bible tells us “do not worry about anything” I am a champion worrier in all aspects of my life, including facebook.  I need to work on that.  I worry that some people may not catch my sarcasm and humor and be offended by a post I’ve made.  Another new study has found that one in four people have deleted posts they’ve made for various reasons. Yep, I’m guilty of that.  I’ve posted something that was funny to me but got to thinking that some of my friends with different opinions may be offended by it so I deleted it.  I sometimes read a post and wonder if they were referring to me.  More worry.  I get to missing someone’s posts and find out I’ve been, oh the dreaded word, “unfriended”.  Then I worry about what I may have done to them to offend them and cause them to remove me from their list.  I’ve also worried after unfriending someone myself because of their language or extremely strong political views and actually hoped they didn’t realize I’d deleted them.  Even though I like them as a friend I may not care to see the types of comments they make.  Yes, I can see how facebook can make you feel bad about yourself.

Another issue is time.  Read here how much average time a person spends on facebook.  Couldn’t that time be used more productively?  Couldn’t we be using this time to interact with family and friends, or reading our bible, or exercising…or working?

I recently saw a news program about how people have become distracted with their cell phones and how it’s causing a health hazard.  They showed video of people looking at their phones and walking right out into traffic.  Even after one car slammed on brakes just a few inches from a man, he never looked up from his phone and continued to walk in front of other traffic. 

Yes, it has got that bad.  I’m guilty myself of having dinner out with my husband and spending a lot of that time browsing on facebook.  Not that my husband is much of a talker anyway but I’m sure other husbands or dates or comrades may be and I think this is a serious nuisance as well as being rude.  I’m sure there’s an etiquette rule against it!

As I wrote this I wondered if others had the same feelings I do.  I googled and wow, yes they do.  Not all are taking a break or leaving for the same reasons I am but yes, many have done the same thing.  Google it and see.

Maybe I’ll write a bit more on my blog that I’ve pretty much abandoned.  Hopefully I’ll read more scripture and do some more praying and hey, I may even try to exercise.  I’ve been looking at bicycles.  And my husband will also have to find something to occupy his time since he’s on my account as much as I am.  Sorry honey.  Maybe we should buy two bicylces.   

So if you need me you’ll have to contact me the old fashioned way…by email or text or the old land line phone since I live in the woods and don’t have decent cell phone service.

I really don’t know how this experiment will affect me.  I don’t know if I’ll be content or if I’ll be having to hold myself back from taking a peek to see what’s going on.  But as of this Saturday night before I go to sleep, I will deactivate my facebook account for one week.  I may or may not be back, depending on how this goes.

The Empty Bucket List

I don’t have a bucket list.  I’m no spring chicken anymore so I’ve thought about it a lot lately but I really don’t know what to put on it.  I’m not a very adventurist person.  I’m not a thrill seeker or adrenaline rush junkie.  My OCD and phobias grow more pronounced the older I get.  I am acrophobic, claustrophobic, arachnophobic, aquaphobic and mysophobic.  So, that knocks out the majority of things I’m guessing most other people have on their list, like sky diving, snorkeling, hang gliding, swimming with dolphins, cave exploring, zip lining, mountain climbing, etc.

But who says your bucket list has to be only extremely physical things?  Can’t it simply be things, or even people, you would enjoy seeing?  That would make it easier for me.

I really don’t have a hobby so to speak.  I do like gardening and nature and I do like to try new foods.  I guess those two things could be worked into something worthwhile to begin my list.

There are a few places I’d like to visit.  I’d love to watch the bats at Carlsbad Caverns.  And NO, I would never want to go inside the caves.  I’d like to see the Redwood forest and Callaway Gardens. 

I would also like to visit Portland, Oregon.  Portland has become the food mecca of the US and I’d love to try some different foods. 

Of course all this visiting requires traveling.  I’m not flying so that means a lot of driving.  It also means staying in hotels…those places where hundreds of other people have slept and showered.  How do I know the sheets are fresh and the toilet was scrubbed?  Maybe I should buy a camper.

Well, so far here is my list:

1.

2.
3.

Any suggestions?  What’s on your list?

A Letter to My Daughter for Mother's Day

My Dearest Daughter,

Happy Mother’s Day. 

I hope your children have brought you as much joy as you’ve given me. 

I know I’ve not been a perfect mother but I’m the one who has loved you more than anyone and I have loved you in my own way. 

You see, I don’t think I was born with as many “mother” genes as some women.  When I was younger my friends would be drawn to babies like magnets.  I was fine just to take a look and be done.  I certainly didn’t want to hold a baby.  It just looked so fragile…and a bit messy and whiney.  I was much more comfortable holding a kitten or a puppy.

When I got married I knew I wanted a baby.  I was just scared to have a baby.  First of all there’s the nine months of gestation.  Next is the labor process with all the pain.  Finally, you have to rear the baby, a fragile little human being that would totally depend on me for quite some time.  Was I capable of doing all that?

So after five years of marriage we decided we were ready for a baby.  That didn’t stop me from being fearful and nervous though.

After fertility drugs and two miscarriages, we finally had you on the way.

The first three months I vomited.  I vomited so much and so hard I busted blood vessels in my eyes.  The next three months I ate.  I would bring my lunch to work and end up eating it for breakfast and then go buy me another lunch.  The final three months I swelled. I think I had one pair of shoes I could get on my feet.

Then it was time.  After a routine visit, the doctor scheduled me to come to the hospital the next morning.  I think a full afternoon of serious cleaning put me on into labor.  We headed on to the hospital that night.  I was very nervous.  After a long night and a required c-section that morning, you were here.  You were beautiful.  Beautiful.  I checked your little toes and they were perfect.  I was a mom.  My life changed forever.   

I kept waiting for all of those mother genes to kick in.  I literally shook with nerves when I gave you your first bath in your little bath tub.  Everything soon got a bit easier. 

The one mother gene that stood out was protection.  I don’t know if it’s because it was so hard getting you here or what but I watched over you constantly and made sure you were comfortable and safe.  I think I woke up every hour of every night and got up to look and make sure you were breathing as you slept.

I watched you learn and grow and become more beautiful.  I was happy when you were happy and I hurt when you hurt.  But we made it.

The next thing I know, I’m with you at the hospital as you have your own children.  Your babies are beautiful. And I know your life has been changed forever.  And mine changed again because I became a grandmother.

So even though I don’t say it nearly enough, I love you.  I am very proud of the wife and mother you have become.  Tell your children you love them every day.  Make sure they hear it often.  Teach them to be kind and respectful to everyone.  Take them to church.  Set good examples for them to follow.  And most importantly, take them to visit their grandparents often.

I hope this is the best Mother’s Day you’ve ever had.

Always and forever,

With love,

Mom.